To pay or not to pay?

Many times I have debated with friends and colleagues over whether the man should pay on the first date.  So what’s the protocol?

Of course it was always easy before our time. If men had a chance in hell with a girl/woman they had to pay and be seen as gentlemen. Those were the days of ‘wooing’ (may they rest in peace).  So is chivalry now dead?  

After all, wooing has since changed to a ‘cat and mouse’ challenge for men. No longer are they seeking to woo the girl of their dreams through romance but to try and charm her into dropping her drawers on the first date. OK, not all, but many of them. You know who you are!  Is that so they get what they want as a ‘one stop shop’ and don’t have to pay again as there won’t be a next time..?!  Has it dropped to the level of ‘I pay out and you put out’?

It also seems to be a cultural issue.  Considering English men were always seen as the true ‘gents’ of our time (according to every period drama on television), they are now the most reluctant when it comes to paying on a date.  I’ve had mixed experiences from men I’ve met, but not one single guy who grew up outside the UK would expect me to go dutch on the first date. So is it Male Brits = tight shits?

The problem then arises whereby the date reaches the ‘time to order the bill’ awkward stage. Then because it’s never a dead cert that the man will be willing to pay, it becomes a cringe worthy moment of dread when that slip of paper arrives!

Personally, regardless of whether I have an enjoyable evening with a man the first time, his chances of a second date reduce to zero the minute he gets fidgety with the bill.  If he can’t go out to make you feel special on day one, imagine date 5.or worse, year 5…

As a rule I truly believe that if a guy asks a girl to meet him for drinks/dinner for the first time then he should foot the bill. No discussion. Most men that I have discussed this with completely agree, so who are this minority of the male species I wonder that ‘conveniently’ pretend to be supporting equality for women?

Come on guys, equality will only ever exist when women are paid the same as men for the same role in the workplace!  You’ll have to do better than that to reach a second date!  Spoil the girl or spoil the date..the choice is yours!